double take

Teen People
December 1998/January 1999
By Nicholas Brendon, as told to Jennifer Graham

Can’t get enough of Buffy the Vampire Slayer’s Nicholas Brendon? Let him introduce you to his identical twin.

Last fourth of July, a busful of teenagers stopped at an In-N-Out Burger in Bakersfield, Calif., thought they spotted me. Psyched to meet Xander Harris from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, one girl ventured over to request autographs for herself and her friends.

“Actually, I’m not Nicholas,” the guy replied. “I’m his twin brother.”

Angered by what they thought was an attempt to blow them off – to them, the guy was obviously Xander – the group erupted, throwing French fries at him. He was forced to get in his car and leave.

The punch line here? The guy really is my identical twin brother, Kelly. People get us confused all the time. In fact, ever since I began playing Buffy’s wisecracking cohort two years ago, Kelly gets recognized as me more than I do. (This is probably because I grow a goatee whenever I’m not working, whereas he’s always clean-shaven). Occasionally, when a starstruck fan approaches him, Kelly pretends that he’s me just to brighten her day. But 60 teenagers at the same time? That’s where he draws the line.

Kelly and I talk about these bizarre moments – and everything else on our minds – all the time. He’s been my best friend ever since we shared our mom’s belly 27 years ago. Take, for example, his providing me much-needed encouragement after my first, not-so-great day on the Buffy set.

It was 100 degrees, I was incredibly nervous (this was my first real acting job) and I wouldn’t drink water for fear of having to use the bathroom while shooting. Worst of all, I didn’t know how to read a call sheet, the schedule that lists the order in which scenes are filmed. During lunch, I suddenly discovered that I had to shoot a dialogue-heavy scene with Sarah Michelle Gellar that afternoon – and I hadn’t even looked at the script! When I got in front of the cameras – dehydrated, hot and flustered – I passed out. It was completely humiliating. So I called Kelly.

“Nick, you’re gonna have more days to prove yourself,” he said. Somehow, his stating the obvious really helped me feel better. Why? Because it came from him.

double trouble

Of course, being a twin can sometimes spoil the party – literally. We grew up in Los Angeles, where our parents – Bob, a car dealer, and Kathy, a talent agent – would throw us joint birthday bashes. Since Kelly is older than me by three minutes, he always got his cake and “Happy Birthday” song first. Mine would come just minutes later, but by then our friends were already eating his cake. They weren’t into my cake.

But in the style department, it was Kelly who drew the short straw. Back in grammar school, my mother dressed us in matching shirts, pants and sweaters. Mine were always blue, and his were always … brown and yellow. While I was sporting the cool color around kindergarten, he was nicknamed “Brownie.”

Despite my fashion superiority, Kelly and I weren’t all that different as kids. But upon entering Chatsworth High School everything changed. You think Xander hates high school? Well I redefined teenage angst. While Kelly went to parties and out on dates, I remained girlfriendless all four years and had acne, braces (he also had braces) and worst of all, a stutter.

Although I was fine speaking around Kelly or our younger brothers (Christian, now 16, and Kyle, now 14), sometimes at school I’d feel the stutter coming on, and I’d keep quiet to prevent mortification. Dialing information once, I tried to ask for the Foot Locker store in Canoga Park. But I kept saying, “C-C-C…” Kelly grabbed the phone and shouted, “Canoga Park! Foot Locker!” I finally got over my stutter after high school, once I realized that my insecurity was causing it and I learned to slow down my speech.

My haven during those dreaded years was the baseball diamond. As a starting player on the nation’s top-ranked high school team in 1988, my junior year, I was dead serious about playing for the Los Angeles Dodgers. But I had to abandon that dream when I hurt my arm a year or so after graduation.

Instead, I started to think about acting – as did Kelly. But knowing we’d be competing for the same parts, he graciously stepped aside and let me take a crack at it first. My mom helped me land some early auditions, while I worked various side jobs: electrician’s assistant, sitcom production assistant, waiter. In the meantime, Kelly worked steadily in production, designing sets for TV shows (he learned on the job). I got a few commercials – among them Clearasil, Burger King and Sprite – but soon became frustrated. I decided to give college a try and even considered going to medical school. Ultimately, when I was 25, I quit school, returned to acting and landed my role on Buffy.

Buffy started out like MTV’s The Real World: The WB put six strangers (Sarah Michelle Gellar, Alyson Hannigan, Charisma Carpenter, David Boreanaz, Anthony Stewart Head and me) together and sent us off for four months of rehearsing and filming. And it worked. We all got along, and it translated into a successful show. Kelly was obviously happy for me, but I felt as if I was leaving him out. So I helped him get a job working on the Buffy set. However, it eventually only made things awkward between us. It seemed so sadistic for me to be in my trailer running lines with David Boreanaz while my brother would walk by hauling an 80-pound tree.

But lately the circumstances have changed. Kelly has decided to pursue his original goal of acting, and he’s been getting great feedback from casting directors at his auditions. I feel better knowing that it’s only a matter of time before he’s in a movie or a television show.

brotherly love

As Kelly and I grow older, we realize how special our relationship is. There’s this unexplained twin phenomenon that even we can’t understand. For example, we’ll be driving together, and out of nowhere we’ll start singing the same song (usually an obscure one, like Paul Simon’s “50 Ways to Leave Your Lover”) at the same time. Weirder still is a recurring dream we both have. One day about four months ago, I mentioned, “I had this dream last night.”

“About an elephant?” he asked.

“Yes,” I answered. “Did you move up really close to the elephant and feel really peaceful the closer you got to it?”

Yes, he did – and that revelation made us both feel a little bit uneasy. I was like, “Hey, get out of my head! It’s my dream!”

But the Unsolved Mysteries aspect of our connection is nothing compared to the emotional bond we share. I’ll never forget what he did when we were 21, after my first breakup with a girl I loved. (I’m a long-term relationship guy, which makes endings especially hard.) Kelly came over to my place that day, picked me up, and we drove to Lake Arrowhead, one-and-a-half hours east of L.A. This Garth Brooks song came on the radio, and I just started bawling. Without a word, Kelly reached over and held my hand. He didn’t have to say anything – I already knew what he meant: No matter what, he’d always be there for me. And vice versa.

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